Assisted Living

28 04, 2017

Do not Go Gentle Into That Good Night…

April 28th, 2017|Ambient Despair, Assisted Living, Op-Ed|

Aging and dying – cursed though these two may be – are the primary physiological behaviors we share with all lifeforms: those that swim in the oceans, walk on land and exist in the vacuum of space. If you live, you will surely age and die. I get that. For more than two decades, no [...]

1 03, 2017

Dementia Contagion (“Second-Hand” Dementia)

March 1st, 2017|Ambient Despair, Assisted Living, Blog, Op-Ed|

Clinical depression is a monster like no other. Today, on my 5,502nd consecutive day (15.07 years) of assisted living in three separate communities I collectively call home, I split a Reuben with Beth, a fellow resident trying to make sense of the world around her. But making sense becomes more difficult every day for Beth [...]

12 01, 2015

The Day The Love Of My Life Went Missing

January 12th, 2015|Ambient Despair, Assisted Living, Blog, Personal/Emotional/Spiritual, Psychology|

I still return to the mall where I last saw my wife. She was wearing a plaid skirt and blue windbreaker. I even remember the last conversation we had. We were standing outside of Florsheim Shoes and I was talking about the time I went fishing in Lake Ontario with the four nephews, and she [...]

16 08, 2014


August 16th, 2014|Ambient Despair, Assisted Living, Personal/Emotional/Spiritual|

    With the tragedy of Robin Williams still fresh in my mind, I want to share something with you. Suicide saved my life. I mean no disrespect to the surviving family with this statement, nor do I seek to make light of another’s suffering. I’m simply recounting my experience. In 1995, at the age [...]

2 06, 2013

“The Ideal and the Actual, Like a Box All With Its Lid”

June 2nd, 2013|Assisted Living, Personal/Emotional/Spiritual|

I received the following letter yesterday: Martin, I came across your article in the Washington Post describing what it's like to live in assisted living when you're much younger than the average resident. My mother was diagnosed with Parkinson's just over a year ago, and she has terrible fatigue and weakness. She is 68. Just [...]

24 04, 2013


April 24th, 2013|Assisted Living, exta dry humor|

I'm sure most of us have heard at least one grueling story recounting the horrors of an innocent farm hand who accidentally caught a loose piece of clothing in a hay baler or perhaps it was a seed planter built completely of Ginzu knives. The story invariably turns ugly in the second paragraph, and by [...]

12 07, 2012

A Room With A Grim View: The ‘Ambient Despair’ That Marks Life In Assisted Living – by Martin Bayne

July 12th, 2012|Ambient Despair, Assisted Living|

  People my age—I’m now sixty-two—might go to an assisted living facility every now and then to visit an older family member. Facilitated aging is a way of life for a growing number of Americans, more than one million of whom now live in roughly 40,000 such facilities across the country.  - Martin Bayne link [...]